Saturn and Discipline: Taking Care of Love

Hei Deirdre
My name is Grethe and I am from Norway. Last year in June 2007 I meet a man who has been on my mind since. In dreams and awake. Now it’s over mainly because of mistrust. But he is all over me if you understand what I mean. It has to be something special between us. When we meet, transiting Pluto was on my Venus and transiting Chiron was on his Venus. I can’t read a chart, only look up individual aspects so I cant see the whole. I would be so glad if you could look at our case and tell me what this relationship means and if we should be together or not.


Dear Grethe,
First I will tell you what I think, and then I will explain why. I think you need to spend some time together. I think you need to know each other and hang out doing nothing just to let all of the energy and cells in your body get used to all the energy and cells in his body. You know you can live without him, and when you remember this, you can eliminate any drama, as this does not help getting to know him. As we emailed back and forth as I was asking you questions, I learned that you and he live in two different countries. To give you my rough idea, I say plan 2008 as a time to get to know him. Communicate share and be open. I think that 2009 looks like a good time for both of you to be together, but one of you needs to take the lead on making this happen. You can let it be you without telling him this with words, just lead with confidence. This is not easy as the woman, I know. But you are a fun, crazy and free Sagittarius, I know you can cook up thousands and millions of interesting ways to connect with him.

I have looked at your compatibility using synastry. His Jupiter is conjunct your Moon/Jupiter. His Jupiter trines your Sun and Mercury. You must have a lot of fun together and laugh. Your Mars sextiles his Venus, so it may be that you have initiated just a little more than he has. It may always be that way. As a woman, I know this is tough, but you have to decide it’s okay to give him tiny little pushes, and not let your self confidence be effected.

On the night you met your Capricorn man, the moon was in Aquarius conjunct Chiron. This was like a moment that spanned very much time and had that large feeling of MAMA. Being close, being taken care of, needing to separate, needing nurturing. That borderline feeling of curling up in Mama’s breasts and feeling an innocent, surprising and normal eroticism.

The moon aspect just before you met was Moon conjunct Neptune, then the next aspect after you met was Moon sextile Pluto. If I look at these two aspects and tell a short story, it is a romantic meeting where it is hard to find out if it is real. The direction this goes is to completely change your lifestyles, maybe to be neighbors, to have houses side by side with different kitchens (but he would always be in your kitchen).

Also when you met, in your progression chart, you had Venus conjunct Saturn. He has Venus conjunct Saturn natally. When I think of the Moon in Aquarius conjunct Chiron on the night you met, I can imagine that an unconventional situation of being together with a lot of space is a realistic path. And because Saturn is involved the path can be long — as long as both of you remain reasonable and stay away from drama. Believe me, this is very painful for him to open up for him, he longs for love, but needs a strange amount of freedom. you have to be ready to give him this, and if this makes you uncomfortable, then forget the project.

If you believe in past lives there is a good chance you had some together before. I think this is why you cant get him out of your mind, because he has really never been out of your mind. I think if you decide to go forward to further explore this relationship, do this with detachment. Be like a scientist doing an experiment. Promise yourself that you will put all of yourself in getting to know him in a more boring day to day way. If it doesn’t work, whether because he doesn’t want to or you don’t feel good or whatever, then stop the experiment, collect yourself and move on — but give yourself a couple of detached years for this.

In terms of timing, I would say allow for some slow communication with him for all of 2008. Write letters over email, call only if it’s cheap, save your resources. During 2009 you both have positive aspects for relationship. It may be that during 2008 you can prepare the logistics. Don’t forget to flirt with him, see if you feel a response. Don’t look for reasons to not trust him. Don’t look at the pool, just dive in. Engage with him intellectually and joyfully. Have him spend some time at your place. Who will move where? This I have no feeling for –maybe both of you to a third country?

When the two of you met, those were very extreme conditions with Pluto on your Venus and Chiron on his Venus. I think that now that some time has passed, you might not feel so desperate, and he may not feel so raw. It is a different time now, its really all different. You can decide to be together. Just know that it wont be until 2009, until Pluto is back in Capricorn for “ever” that you will get a sense of reality. In the mean time, enjoy the slow and soulful process. You are a wise woman, and you can lead this project in a successful and fulfilling way.

Take very good care of yourself.


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